Civility...

With the recent disturbances in the west side, and hundreds of other calls a month that we deal with, I believe that a call for common decency is in order.

I spoke the other day with a 90 year old WWII veteran whose neighbor had just finished yelling at him. Apparently the trigger for the neighbor’s tirade was the fact that the older gentlemen told him, “good day.” With this, the man yelled, “That’s a pretty big assumption!” and the fight was on.

I went next door to speak with the man who was immediately hostile and abrasive. He remained so the entire duration of our time together. It took all the “Gandhi-powers” I could muster to deal with the gentleman. I’m guessing that the angry guy was socially, if not mentally ill. Either way, he was not happy to see me come, and he was not happy when I left.

One of the titles ascribed to Police Officers is that of “Peace Officers”. I find myself wearing the hat of a Peace Officer many times a shift. I find myself telling people frequently on calls that, “We live in a civil society, so please act civilly.” This is often successful and seems to stir some remembrance of the “golden rule.”

I was raised to get along with everyone. While not always successful, I have found that this upbringing has served me well in life. I was taught to speak respectfully to others, especially adults. I would have never dreamed of saying anything untoward to an adult, let alone a Police Officer. There are many in Chico not raised the same way. I have dealt with many who have never had a kind word spoken to them and often don’t know what to do when they hear one. There are lots of children who were raised to communicate in a manner that would make Springer blush. It’s sad, but predictable when they grow up and end up in the criminal justice system. Religious leader David O. McKay is oft quoted as saying, “No other success can compensate for failure in the home.” Civility begins in the home.

I think that most people feel the same way that I do, but we are the silent majority. Respect is something that is not expected and is therefore not displayed. Apparently, somewhere along the line, not caring about how others feel has become a virtue.

Common decency is the WD-40® of our society. Patience and forgiveness are the things that allow us to get over the bumps and scrapes of everyday life. In a room of 100 people, there are 100 different views of the world. This is due to the fact that no one person has the same personality or life experiences. These compose the “filters” that people see the world through. Without patience, all of these different personalities can cause a lot of tension. I believe that a majority of our calls for service occur when people fail to be decent to others.

When I patrol, I like to wave at people. I usually drive around with my hand out the patrol car window and wave at as many people as possible. While this may seem like a dumb thing to do, it tells me a lot of things about the person I’m waving at. When someone waves back, it tells me that he or she is most likely a happy and decent person. If the person glares at me, or looks at me then spits on the ground (a common sign of disrespect towards law enforcement), it tells me that they may have some disregard for the law and for those who seek to uphold the law. If I get a hesitant wave from someone, even from a gang banger, it tells me that they are not completely lost to that world.